Jokes for all

Feel free to browse the collection of tall tales, yarns and downright lies.   They are all family safe - the test I apply is "would I tell this to someone's grandmother?"  If no,  I don't use it.     (That doesn't mean i don't appreciate a dirty joke,  but I don't think they're appropriate for broadcast on the radio - you never know who is listening or how old they are or  what their attitudes to dirty jokes amounts to. )

Buying a Cow

A farmer had been taken advantage of several times by the local car dealer. One day, the car dealer informed the farmer that he was coming over to purchase a cow.

The farmer priced his cow as follows:

Basic cow........................... 499.95
Shipping and handling................ 35.75
Extra stomach........................ 79.25
Two tone exterior.................... 142.10
Produce storage compartment.......... 126.50
Heavy duty straw chopper............. 189.60
Four spigot/high output drain system. 149.20
Automatic fly swatter................ 88.50
Genuine cowhide upholstery.......... 179.90
Deluxe dual horns.................... 59.25
Automatic fertilizer attachment..... 339.40
4 x 4 traction drive assembly....... 884.16
Pre-delivery wash and comb.......... 69.80
FARMER SUGGESTED LIST PRICE:....... 2843.36

Additional dealer adjustments:...... 300.00

TOTAL LIST PRICE (Including options): $3143.36

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