Jokes for all

Feel free to browse the collection of tall tales, yarns and downright lies.   They are all family safe - the test I apply is "would I tell this to someone's grandmother?"  If no,  I don't use it.     (That doesn't mean i don't appreciate a dirty joke,  but I don't think they're appropriate for broadcast on the radio - you never know who is listening or how old they are or  what their attitudes to dirty jokes amounts to. )

Bluegrass in Heaven

Two old retired professional bluegrass musicians, John and Al, have been friends all their lives. It seems that Al is dying, and John comes to visit him every day.

"Al," says John, "You know how we have both loved bluegrass all our lives, and how we played on the Opry together with Bill Monroe for so many years. Al, you have to do me one favor. When you get to Heaven, and I know you will go to Heaven, somehow you've got to let me know if there's bluegrass in there."

Al looks up at John from his death bed, and says, "John, you've been my best friend for many years. If it is at all possible, I'll let you know."

And shortly after that, Al passes on. It is midnight a couple of nights later. John is sound asleep when he is awakened by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calls out to him, John.... John...."

"Who is it?" says John sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?"

"John, it's me, Al."

"Come on. You're not Al. Al just died."

"I'm telling you," insists the voice. "It's me, Al!"

"Al? Is that you? Where are you?"

"I'm in heaven," says Al, "and I've got to tell you, I've got really good news and a little bad news."

"So, tell me the good news first," says John.

"The good news," says Al, "is that there is bluegrass in heaven."

"Better yet, all our old buddies who've gone before us are there. Better yet, we're all young men again. Better yet, it's always show-time at a giant bluegrass festival here and it never rains or snows. And best of all, we can play all we want with the best that ever lived, and we never get tired! Last night I was at a show with Bill Monroe, Lester Flatt, Jim McReynolds, John Hartford, and Jimmy Martin"

"Really?" says John, "That is fantastic, wonderful beyond my wildest dreams! But, now, tell me the bad news?"

"You're playing banjo with Carter Stanley next Saturday night."

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