Jokes for all
Feel free to browse the collection of tall tales, yarns and downright lies. They are all family safe - the test I apply is "would I tell this to someone's grandmother?" If no, I don't use it. (That doesn't mean i don't appreciate a dirty joke, but I don't think they're appropriate for broadcast on the radio - you never know who is listening or how old they are or what their attitudes to dirty jokes amounts to. )
Dad Jokes
Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary.
Suddenly over the public address system the captain announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'[m afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and with luck we should be able to land on the beach. However the odds are that we may never be rescued and we will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives."
Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the island.
An hour later, Abe turns to his wife and asks, "Esther, did we pay our $5000 PBS pledge cheque yet?"
"No sweetheart," she responds.
Abe, still shaken from the crash landing then asks, "Esther, did we pay our American Express card yet?"
"Oh no! I'm sorry, I forgot to send the cheque," she says.
"One more thing, Esther. .. Did you remember to send the cheques for Visa and Mastercard this month?" he asks.
"Oh dear, forgive me Abe," begged Esther, "I didn’t send them either."
Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years. Esther pulls away and asks him "What was that for?"
Abe answers, "They'll find us!"
