Jokes for all
Feel free to browse the collection of tall tales, yarns and downright lies. They are all family safe - the test I apply is "would I tell this to someone's grandmother?" If no, I don't use it. (That doesn't mean i don't appreciate a dirty joke, but I don't think they're appropriate for broadcast on the radio - you never know who is listening or how old they are or what their attitudes to dirty jokes amounts to. )
Some magazine editors have no taste
PLAYGIRL INC
NEW ENGLAND BRANCH
PROVIDENCE, RHODE ISLAND, 02902
Dear Michael,
We wish to thank you for your letter and Polaroid photo which we recently received. We regret, however, that we will not be able to use your photo as our "Playgirls's Man Of The Month".
When rated by our AAW (Auricious American Women) on a scale of 1-10 your body was rated a minus 2 (-2). The panel is comprised of widowed females ranging in ages from 50-75 years old who have been deprived of sexual activity for a minimum of five years.
To confirm your below average rating, we submitted your photograph to a second panel, the HUHA (Horny Undersexed Housewives of America) whose ages range from 25-35. However we could not get them to contain their laughter long enough to rate you.
Please be assured that should the tastes of American women deteriorate so drastically that a body such as yours would be in demand, you will be notified. Meanwhile please do not call us, we will call you.
Sincerely,
PLAYGIRL INC
P.S. It pains us to inform you that had your photo been used, the staple holding our centrefold together would have completely obstructed what you refer to as your "item of interest".
<< Previous Next >>
